I was teaching my two sons some nursery rhymes the other day, and I came to the conclusion that I am the grand old Duke of York!
Oh, The grand old Duke of York,
He had ten thousand men;
He marched them up to the top of the hill,
And he marched them down again.
And when they were up, they were up,
And when they were down, they were down,
And when they were only half-way up,
They were neither up nor down.
I am the grand old Duke of York and the hill that I am forever climbing up and down is my depression.
I’ve been feeling quite down for the past week or so. I’m not sure if it is just the time of year, the clocks going back and it getting dark at 4.30pm and the colder weather setting in, but I am struggling to get out of bed in the morning again. It has really brought home that, like the Duke and his army of ten thousand men, I have constant battles to fight in my war against depression. The daily battles include burning the toast, my son throwing up on me when I’ve just got dressed, toddler tantrums, a huge electricity bill through my letterbox etc etc.
I thought that I had finally made my way up to the top of the hill, I was happier than I had been in a while, then I suddenly found myself at the very bottom of the hill again. I think I need to find a route to half way up the hill – then I’m neither up nor down. I need to find coping strategies so that my daily battles don’t get on top of me and the hill doesn’t turn in to a mountain that I have to climb. Maybe I need to start CBT again, get out and do some exercise…
What are your tips to stop your everyday battles from getting on top of you? Please share your ideas – you might help me and the other readers of my blog!
Read my depressing depression story here: http://themelancholicmummy.wordpress.com/2012/10/23/every-cloud/